When You Say Too Much

You said too much. Now your foe is ready to curse you. He is planning to defend his pride, fame, fortune, hobby, love interest and anything else that stands in the way of a relationship with his Creator. He is fuming! Red face, yelling, and throwing things, he is walking quickly toward you. Is this the time to scream out, “In the name of Jesus!” Do you extend your arms in order to protect your face and body in case he swings on you? You don’t have much time to think and much less time to get in a defensive posture. “What would Jesus do in a situation like this?” Your foe is going to go for your head. Whether he uses words to attack your spirit or his hands to beat, choke, or push you into submission. His ultimate goal is to quiet and hurt you at the same time, because what you thought was a good word, a message of truth, he took the wisdom and rejected it!

Know that God turns situations like this into life lessons. The adversary most likely set you up a long time ago to get into an argument with someone that could have been settled peaceably, but escalated into something far worse. His plan is to get you to doubt God, stop helping others, and hopefully die with regret.

When we first felt that information given to us from a relative, friend or co-worker was incorrect and that what was said didn’t match up with facts, the enemy was ready to play his share of mind games. Therefore, when the confrontation took place, Satan influenced a myriad of distractions to keep from the one we are talking to from hearing our truth, someone else's or even truth as it relates to him or her. Satan moved his demons to launch their attacks. We have some options we can choose during confrontation: use words, fists or walk away.

Walking away has gotten a bad rap over the years. It is considered weak. But the truth is, it is one of the most strongest acts you can use to keep from doing something you most likely will regret later especially when emotions are running high. Even the strongest, most disciplined soldier knows when it’s time to retreat. That urge to continue to say what is on your mind (while the small voice is warning you to keep quiet) and the temptation to back up what you say with your fists, is never worth losing your freedom, finances, family, life or even your soul? It's always better to remain silent and walk away when the fire breathing dragon is ready to burn you with his tongue and violent gestures.

Take this moment to pray.

“Lord, there are times when I just get so angry that I think evil thoughts about those who I am disputing with. Teach me to be wiser when dealing with situations that make me feel threatened, nervous, angry, or scared. Help me to overcome what bothers me on the inside. Give me the courage to walk away when necessary. Bless me with the words to speak when I have to communicate a concern. In Jesus name.” 

 

The following are some tips to keep in mind when communicating with individuals who might have issues with you:   

 

1.  The moment you realize you are revealing too much about yourself or someone else, cut the conversation off.  Try to stay away from any subject matter that you are uncertain about the details.

2.  Ask questions rather than make assumptions such as: how a person feels about a situation rather than "I know you felt like..."

3.  Don't verbalize anything that makes you feel uncomfortable or puts someone else in a bad light especially when that person isn't around to defend his or herself.

4.  Avoid revealing valuable information to those who are gossips, liars, mean-spirited and have other unrighteous characteristics.

5.  When one approaches you about your concerns involving someone or something, always take a pause and say something like, "I need to think about that...I will need to get more information before I can say something...Let me address that issue with..."  For the person who is the trouble-maker, he or she will want to take back what was said particularly when you say you will talk to someone about the matter he or she is raising.

6.  Always keep in mind someone might be recording your exchange, so don't say anything that you might regret later.

7.  Stand by what you say.  Whether what you said was good, bad or otherwise, admit you said it and never apologize for speaking truth.  For example, one comes to you with information you said that wasn't encouraging or nice about someone else,  you say, "I admit that I did say that.  Could I have said it differently, kept my feelings to myself, or talked to the person at the time about it?  Sure.  But at that moment, the statement needed to be said and hopefully some changes will be made as a result.  So no I don't apologize for the truth, but I do apologize for not coming up with a better way to deal with the issue."  

Check out an insightful blog about workplace issues written from a practical sense by Nicholl McGuire here.