Double-Minded

A double minded man is unstable in all his ways.

James 1:8

 

 

The double-minded is on your job, television, maybe even sitting right next to you, someone who can’t seem to make up his or her mind about anything! The Bible says, “A double minded man is unstable in all his ways” (Jam. 1:8). Yet, some of us consider a person like this a trusted relative or friend—that is until they show their disloyalty! By then we realize we have an enemy on our hands, one who doesn’t much care about our feelings or what he or she promised.

Your beloved may be in your corner today and gone the next. The double-minded are believers in God when it is convenient and unbelievers when believing in Christ is unpopular. They will believe when the walk is easy, but when the pressure is on, “I don’t know what to believe!” the double-minded will say.

Let’s say, something has come up in conversation with one who you know isn’t sold out about God or his teachings. The kind of statements that cause one some discomfort about his or her lifestyle, habits, and other things. You feel led to ask the following challenging question, while this person tries to dodge your every comment, “So are you really a believer? I mean you talk about church and how much you read the Bible, but I have seen the way you act with people and I have to question you on this?” Uh oh! What do you think the double-minded man or woman is going to do? Defend his or her actions of course, followed by a question and answer session where you are the topic of conversation, and a conclusion where he or she hopes you will go away. Now we can stand there with a dumb expression on our faces if we want to, but a warrior for God, one who he is chosen to meet the people where they are will not stand still. He will continue with his conversation until he exhausts himself being careful not to name-call, curse, or physically fight. However, the one who is listening to the rights and wrongs about his or her life, well there is no guarantee that he or she will react to this sort of debate in a dignified manner. One ought to pray and get out of an intense situation as soon as he or she feels the prompting of the Holy One otherwise you fail in getting this person to ponder on his or her double-minded ways.

In the Book of James 4:4-12 (New International Version), we notice that James confronts the double-minded with bold statements, here is some of the text, “You adulterous people, don’t you know that friendship with the world means enmity against God? Therefore, anyone who chooses to be a friend of the world becomes an enemy of God.” Read the remaining text for yourself, because James reminds us that if we stand up against the devil he will flee and that if we come near to God he will come to us. The Scriptures in this section teach us how to handle the double-minded in such a way that causes he or she to think about things from a spiritual perspective and then compare what he or she has learned with one’s worldly deeds.

Double-minded people just don’t come into being, they are created. Some have been driven into this state of mind by hypocrites, liars, and cheats. If you are guilty of saying one thing and doing another, then don’t look at those around you as being the crazies, look at yourself and ask, “What have I done to make this person feel conflicted about what I am saying and doing when it comes to my faith?”

Sometimes we find ourselves compromising truth because we are not ready to give up certain perks and favor with others. “Well I said that because I didn’t want to upset my husband…I acted this way because I didn’t want them to kick me out the group…I chose to commit to this project even though I know God wouldn’t approve, but I need money.” So when new believers, backsliders or the unsaved witnesses our actions, he or she assumes that it is okay to be about God’s business on some days and take off on others for the sole intent to make someone else happy, achieve selfish gain, or manipulate others because someone told you to do it.

For some of you reading this book, your past decision-making, voided of God, have made your current lifestyle a roller-coaster that never seems to end—up one day, and down the next and around a loop. If you blame anyone, blame yourself.

Most people with mental illnesses are double-minded. Think of those in your family that seem to be okay with or without certain medicines. You may be able to tell the difference in the personalities when they haven’t taken their daily dose. Some people under doctor’s care need prescription medicines so that their minds remain relatively stable; otherwise, they are prone to do something that may hurt themselves or others if they don’t take meds. However, there are those prescriptions that cause more harm than good; therefore some patients might make faulty decisions while being under the influence which would make them appear like they don’t know what they like, want, or need. Consider the medicines, herbal remedies, and other substances you may be eating and drinking that might be affecting the way others view your actions. You made a rush decision last week after eating a very good meal with someone you admire, now this week you regret your decision. You felt good about a certain person because he or she treated you well at a lovely event, but now you don’t feel that excited about going out with them. What changed? The atmosphere, your mood, and a lack of trust in your Creator, because had you been focused on what he said over dinner or at the event, you would have never committed to anything no matter how nice looking the person or environment or how good the food was. But so many enter into a war with an enemy, because he was “nice, she looked beautiful, and the food was great.” Some unfortunately get what they deserve, because they acted without God in the plan while claiming to be one of his chosen. You have to wonder that if one is sincerely a believer in Christ, why would he or she subject his or her self to enemy schemes by appeasing one’s flesh in a room of potential foes? If there is anytime to watch what you eat, drink, do, and say is in a room full of people watching you, watching me. But the foe gets you fat and happy, then takes advantage of you immorally between cursing, moaning, crying, and laughing—notice typical emotions that help lure you into the trap that your foe has set for you while the double-minded witness claims, “I didn’t see that one coming…honestly I thought you knew…I am so sorry.” Meanwhile, a double-minded foe who has been paid by your enemy, like Judas, set you up.

I have heard many believers have more trust in man-made substances then what God has to say. Many of these drugs show up in places where one feels most comfortable. What’s worse, some so-called friends will trick you into drinking or eating something for the sole purpose of taking advantage of you.

Then there are those individuals who are sincerely concerned about your health and sometimes the Lord is the one that moved on them to encourage you to see a doctor. Through situations dealing with our health, we can be a bit double-minded and claim to believe that God will heal us; yet, not do what he has asked as if we have less face because we choose to get treatment. If God sent a messenger to you, evidently you must not be listening to him, so what better time to put your faith to work—start praying! There are those who don’t want to face reality and don’t want to believe that God has healed them either, so they will continue to run to doctors and their medicines long after God has used his messengers to say, “Enough!” They fall in love with the high. They enjoy the feel-good trip which also activates a warped sense of reasoning, disturbs one’s faith, and in time affects one’s personal and public relationships. We see evidence of this sort of behavior with entertainers and you may have personallyt witnessed illogical behavior amongst those you love high on drugs.

Some double-minded believers with double-minded lifestyles will justify substance abuse or illegal drugs as being okay with God, because “he understands and he created them.” I can’t help but think that those who feel this way are running churches, teaching others, and managing things like the public’s wealth all while under the influence. It isn’t any wonder that some lose their minds and die prematurely.

Despite how much we choose to look the other way when someone is visibly in trouble, a confused, tormented mind can wreck havoc on the homefront, church body, in business and elsewhere. If the double-minded believer seems to stumble often when it comes to walking with God, challenged when it comes to accepting the word of God, and overall just seems to have frequent personal problems—no matter how much one prays or gets others to pray, you have to ask yourself, “Should I be involving myself with this person or ministry?” In Romans 16:17, Paul warns, “Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.” Arguing, back-biting, lying, and causing any number of negative events as a result of saying one thing regarding God’s word, but doing another will be exposed whether in speech over the phone or publically. Everyone will know who is sincerely walking with the Lord and remaining faithful simply by how he or she deals with a spiritual issue. A man on the street curses and acts like a fool displaying irresponsible behavior while saying, “God bless you! I will pray for you! God will fight my battles!” is no better than a bonafide Satan worshiping, money-loving fool who loves to argue with anyone in his path, because with both individuals, they glorify self, lifestyle and how he or she treats others over what the one true God says about loving one’s enemy. When you believe in God, yet do what you want to do, you display double-mindness and unfortunately you have to keep going back to the Lord confessing and repenting for the same sins over and over again until you are humbled enough to pick a side—your creator or self?

Sometimes those in leadership refuse to accept that a beloved church member, relative or friend is mentally unstable. They reason that a wayward believer’s mental condition is due to a personal issue; therefore they might expect believers to treat the situation lightheartedly. Leaders may instruct the church body to assist the double-minded brother or sister in Christ while using Scripture like, 1 Thessalonians 5:11, “Wherefore comfort yourselves together, and edify one another, even as also ye do.” This is a great passage of Scripture in its proper place, but telling a congregation to build one another up when someone is doing and saying things that are unstable is not a wise thing to do.

We are to confront our brothers and sisters in Christ when they are in the wrong, not pretend as if they are okay when it is obvious that they are not. “If your brother sins against you, go and show him his fault, just between the two of you. If he listens to you, you have won your brother over” (Matt. 18:15).

When dealing with family conflict, in the New Living Translation Bible it says, “Do not nurse hatred in your heart for any of your relatives. Confront people directly so you will not be held guilty for their sin.” Family will attempt to get you to go along with their foolishness, so as to appear like they are justified in their sins. Rather than do the following like: argue, point out everything that is wrong with them, encourage them in their sins, and do other similar behaviors—that look like you are better than they are—listen, but then quietly pray in your spare time for them that they will see the error of their ways. We must avoid the temptation to want to put aside our beliefs and act in ways that make us appear like we are double-minded when it comes to worldly behaviors—what’s right is right, but what’s wrong is wrong.

Some leaders will even go so far as to cover-up the repeated wrong-doing of afflicted believers or unbelievers, giving these people a pass on their misdeeds. One way they do this is by gloating over members or periodic church-goers’ history of niceties especially if these people were generous and committed givers. Sometimes Christian leaders will look the other way when they know they are struggling with double-mindness too. Not every pastor, evangelist, apostle, prophet, or teacher believes everything that the Lord says and worse, some have more fear for Satan than they do God.

When you know you have a person in your circle who is unstable you will not want to entrust important tasks to him or her. If this person has already shown some instability in the way he or she communicates and does other things, you will need to deal with such a person in a manner that teaches witnesses that no matter what the mental condition, the church cannot accept any behaviors and teachings that go against the word of God whether given prophetically, naturally, or in the Bible. For instance, a wishy-washy person may take one political side or another depending on who is padding his or her pockets. He or she may be a fan of one sports team amongst family and friends. But when standing in front of a different audience, he or she may support another team. People, who fight against one side or another, act in these ways because they stand to gain something. When you see the writing on the wall, methodically break ties from such a person in your group setting. If you don’t, he or she will eventually fall weak to an enemy’s offers and become a traitor or what some might call “a snitch” or “double agent” as discussed later in this book. To strategically break from someone, not just a double-minded person, may include any number of ways such as: lessening contact with him or her to the point that the person is no longer relevant in your life, cutting his or her workload gradually, keeping him or her out of certain meetings in the hope that he or she will eventually disconnect from the group, and ignoring his or her ideas, requests, and complaints. On the surface, this sort of behavior doesn’t look like the Christian thing to do, but I assure you that God has a way of creating distance between the mentally weak and the strong that looks just like the tips I described. Consider some of the biblical stories where an enemy was marked, dismissed from a group, city, etc., fought in a war, and eventually destroyed as a result of being disobedient, lying, scheming, and more when interacting with the people of God.

The double-minded man or woman is whatever you want him or her to be on any given day just so long as there is some benefit to his or her acting double-minded. If there is nothing to gain, the person will typically stand his or her ground. “I will not vote Democrat! I refuse to listen to that music! I don’t participate in pagan celebrations!” a minister says, but then when he is amongst his brotherhood, “I love those democratic views. I enjoy listening to heavy metal music. Whenever I get a Thanksgiving or Christmas invite, I am there!”

A double-minded individual may be in a relationship that is riddled with problems. This person may not be able to make up his or her mind about staying committed or breaking up. For example, he says, “Today, I love her, but tomorrow, I don’t know. She got upset with me the other day and I don’t like the way she talks to me.” But only last week, he proposed to her and told the world how committed he was to her—go figure?

Relationships aren’t like water faucets you can’t just turn them on and off. Yet, from the double-minded man or woman’s point of view, he or she sees nothing wrong with fluctuating thoughts of make up and break up, because that’s what other couples do. Worldly behaviors simply don’t apply to God’s children.

These unstable minded people usually don’t have any longevity in much of anything. They don’t keep friends, jobs, relationships, money, hobbies, homes, or much else for long. Their minds are always thinking about the next best thing. Yesterday’s idea is old, today’s idea is new and tomorrow’s idea will replace them all. It’s usually the people around them that attempt to help the double-minded stay grounded. Without a network of support to keep up the front of someone who has much influence nationally and internationally, the one who is secretly double-minded is most often exposed. A double-mind tends to produce multiple personalities from what I have noticed with many. There seems to be a pattern with those who have this condition where they can turn into someone else before they finish telling a story or performing on stage. Outsiders, looking in, tend to think such a person as “insane, a little off, out there,” or “irresponsible.” Whose faces come to mind in the secular entertainment industry while writing this include singers and songwriters like: Katy Perry, Lady Gaga, Beyonce (Sasha Fierce), Nicki Minaj (Roman), Britanny Spears, Madonna, the late Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston just to name a few.

In Psalm 119:113, the Psalmist David says, “…I hate vain thoughts: but thy law do I love.” Vain thoughts are inconsistent. They flatter, exaggerate, cause debate, and overall destroy meaningful relationships. However, the law is consistent. It doesn’t change like the wind. The purpose of the law is to build people up, not tear them down.

A man who is certain about getting married is not going to tell his friend, “I don’t think I want to get married.” A woman who is certain about relocation is not going to tell her co-workers, “I don’t think I want to do it.” The double-minded often think of how others impact his or her life which keeps him or her on a sea-saw ride of emotions. They will get others to side with his or her way of doing things, that is, until one’s mind changes again. Thank God for his wisdom! Without it, all people would be making changes daily to suit them.

The double-minded man or woman is also known as a “two-faced person” in some circles. This means that he or she appears one way in front of one set of people and a different way around the other set. One would also call such a person, “fake” or “phony.” Both double-minded or “two-faced” people are one in the same. For instance, let’s say you have a friend who enjoys rock music; however when she is around certain friends, who are R&B listeners, she acts as if she doesn’t. When you point out her interest in front of others, she acts offended. “You are confused,” she says, “I never said I like rock music.” It’s obvious she’s acting in front of your circle of friends, so to avoid an argument, you just play along. But then when you get her alone, you might say, “I know you like rock music. You don’t have to pretend like you don’t, because my friends are black.” The friend replies, “Yeah. Well I didn’t want to be judged.”

People like this usually act this way out of fear of criticism, to protect his or herself from backlash, to fit in, and other reasons. They might act as if they are okay one day, but then look for an opportunity to pay someone back for finding out the real truth about them. According to James 4:8, “Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you. Cleanse your hands, ye sinners; and purify your hearts, ye double minded.” God instructs those who are double minded to purify their hearts. The only way they can do that is if they consistently walk with God and open up their minds and hearts to him; rather than focus on pleasing self and others.

You may recall a few folks like this in your own family. They spend hours thinking of ways to look good in front of certain people—even if it goes against their better judgment. They may be so-called believers of God, but can’t tell you the last time they read the Bible and actually practiced anything they read. Yet they will exclaim, “God is so good! God is wonderful!” as long as their skies are blue and the sun is shining in their worlds. But the minute, the storm clouds come and the rain comes pouring down, they don’t have too much, if anything, to say about God. Besides, when you observe their actions, you have to wonder if they are still Christians during times of crisis. Cussing like a sailor, yelling at everyone in their path, and ready to fight about any and everything, the double-minded person is now walking on the side of the enemy. Somehow through trials and circumstances, this once stable-minded person has lost his or her mind. Maybe even a few people have said to him or her, “Have you lost your mind? Who are you? I don’t know this person anymore.”

We have all been guilty of this kind of behavior at times, but just because we have all had some “I can’t make up my mind” moments in our lives, doesn’t mean its okay to keep acting indecisively especially on major life decisions. Pray, fast, talk with wise counsel, check the Bible for answers, but avoid the temptation to follow after the devil’s “too good to be true” scenarios. When we find ourselves repeatedly saying and doing things that don’t build others up, we have to ask ourselves, “Am I really a child of God or am I just pretending so that I can get some kind of favor from someone or a group?” When you are real with self and God he will answer your prayers.

God seeks out people who are consistent in both their beliefs and actions. Take for instance 1 Kings 18:21, “Elijah went before the people and said, ‘How long will you waver between two opinions? If the Lord is God, follow him; but if Baal is God, follow him.’ But the people said nothing.”

From the boardroom to the church, the Lord wants people who are stable in all their ways! He isn’t interested in lukewarm Christians working in a lukewarm church. According to Revelation 3:16, “So then because thou art lukewarm, and neither cold nor hot, I will spue thee out of my mouth.”

So when we play the game of flipping and flopping with the truth, saying one thing and doing another, we are seen as unreliable, inconsistent, or as mentioned earlier, crazy! “You don’t know if she is coming or going…” says one person. “I thought I knew him, but it is clear after he said what he did, I don’t.” says another.

Double-minded people don’t make good friends. They forgive on one day and unforgive on another. Angry then happy, okay, or so-so depending on how the wind blows, the indecisive goes with whatever program is set before he or she. They are often too weak in their commitments to people, job, faith, and other things to be of any real help to anyone; therefore they always need someone around to make up their minds for them. We must be mindful of the double-minded, and how we react to them because it is very easy to be come frustrated and rude with them. Do as Ephesians 4:29 suggests, “Let no corrupt communication proceed out of your mouth, but that which is good to the use of edifying, that it may minister grace unto the hearers.”

There will be those times in life that we will simply change our minds and there is nothing wrong with that particularly if it means keeping one from living unrighteously. We may not want to do something, because we discover that the people or actions are inconsistent with our belief system or because God intervened on our behalf. It’s okay to change your mind about sinning, but what isn’t okay, is to initially do what’s right only to cave into the pressure of doing wrong then finding excuses to cover sin. You also don’t want to allow wrong-doing to happen right in front of you. Then don’t bother to address the issue with the person or one nearby who could help mediate the situation. If the pastor doesn’t want to handle an ungodly situation, the boss refuses to listen, and a parent pretends like a problem is just going to fix itself, maybe you might get his or her attention if you turn up the heat, so to speak. There are human resources offices, board members, favorite relatives, local police, and friends in high places that can be used to open up blind eyes and double-minds.

We see a good example of people acting double-minded during seasons when one is running for a government office such as, when a politician is on the campaign trail for president. He or she initially says all the right things, but then once a few people whisper in the politician’s ears (after he becomes president of course) about why some idea isn’t going to work, the leader will then falters in his or her beliefs. Before long, the president begins to talk and act in ways that one may question, “Is this the same man or woman who once desired to lead our country?”

God allows his Holy Spirit to convict us when we are acting inconsistently in our words and actions. That uncomfortable feeling in one’s spirit should make him or her want to immediately make wrongs, right. If your inconsistent behavior doesn’t bother you, then you should take the time and ask the Lord, “Why?” Ask him to heal you from your hardened heart and show you how you can be more consistent in the things you say and do so as to keep the peace in your household, on the job, and elsewhere.

Unbelieving critics are inconsistent in their beliefs and actions.

Think about a time when an inconsistent Bible-believing church-goer had said something that just didn’t sit right in your spirit about going to church. The critic may have claimed to have a word from the Lord just so that he or she could talk about you or someone you know who often goes to church. This person may have disguised his or her personal opinion up in prophecy. However, you know better.

God has given us the wisdom of his word and common sense to discern right from wrong. You may have heard an unbeliever or backslider say something like, “That’s why I don’t go to church, because those folks are all hypocrites.” But what they fail to realize is that they too are hypocrites, saying they believe in the Lord and pray; yet, very little in their lives reflect that they even trust in the Lord, much less talk and listen to him on a regular basis.

We must be mindful of those inconsistencies we display around both the believing and unbelieving, but we shouldn’t allow what others say or do to keep us from praying, attending church, participate in Bible study, socialize with other like-minded believers or read God’s words. We should also guard our hearts by not “doing as the Romans do” particularly when God isn’t in the plan.

Have you ever noticed a sister or brother in Christ, or an elder or deacon act inconsistent when sharing their beliefs with others? He or she may bow his or her head in prayer at the dinner table and then minutes later, act as ungodly as the next person. A worship leader may speak in tongues, give words of knowledge and have other phenomenal gifts, but only use them when he or she can be seen by the church congregation. Sometimes people behave in ways for show in order to win friends and receive money.

Question Mr. & Mrs. Inconsistent (both in and out of the church) on the things they do. Listen to them as they explain why they do what they do without attacking them. Hopefully, they will think about what they just told you then later think how ridiculous they sound when giving their explanations. If they don’t self-reflect, most likely, they will turn the table back on you and ask you, “Well why do you do what you do?” Be brief when you answer, “I do this because…or I don’t do that because…” and avoid debating. Bring the conversation back to your original question and then keep silent. The silence creates a moment for thinking and keeps you from saying something that might backfire on you. When in conflict, remember Proverbs 15:1, “A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”

Mr. & Mrs. Inconsistent would love for you to take on a defensive stance or argue with you, so that he or she can be in a position to rebuke you about your yelling, talking down to them, being disrespectful, or failing to act Christian like. Don’t fall for it!

Remember, double-minded men and women will be offended by your questioning their actions or exposing their errors. These people may become your worst enemies without ever showing their upset.

Solution:

Be cautious and watch for signs when people are acting different toward you since bringing up their inconsistent way of doing or saying things. It is only a matter of time that they will be working on the side of the enemy in an attempt to destroy any efforts you make in living righteously and consistently.  Always have a back up plan if you suspect the wishy-washy type might retaliate against you one day.

A look back…

Do you recall when you or someone you know became a believer? You were probably told to do some things publicly that were considered “doing the right thing” and you did them grudgingly or without any thought. At times, you may have been inconsistent in your actions which made people wonder whether or not you were sincerely a believer or just a pretender.

We must remember that the sinner or backslidden Christian is acting in ways that are familiar to him or her. This person or group may not stop doing something without objection or excuse.

Scripture Reference

Colossians 2:8

Galatians 1:14-17

Peter 1:18

Matthew 15:2-9

 

Prayer

Teach my brother (sister) in Christ your ways. Remind them that walking with you is not for show. Point out inconsistent things I say and do as it relates to my walk with you. Help me to be more consistent in what I say and do in Jesus name.