When the Church is used as a Match-making Service

It isn’t any wonder that some relationships don’t last between Christians.  If a single man or woman has visited churches over the years with the intent to meet someone new, when the new relationship grows old, he or she just might be out on the prowl again.  These men and women, who look to find their next wife or husband in the church, often find nothing more than disappointment and frustration.  They also will notice that they are creating all sorts of division within the body of Christ as well.  Committed couples view the Christian player as a threat.  Others look at him or her as immature, foolish and someone that would be better off out in the world. 

Using the church as a match-making service is risky and doesn’t always connect like-minded believers.  Instead, some find themselves pressured to get married because the church says so.  Others may not find a partner attractive, but money, material wealth and connections might be a lure for wanting to be in a relationship.

Photo by Nina Strehl on Unsplash

Meeting a lover in church and eventually having sex with this person, outside of marriage, will cause conflict between new believers. Those who are not that spiritually strong will look at such a connection and may feel it is okay to mimic the behavior.  Others will compromise their personal beliefs or possibly existing relationships for a little fun. 

Unfortunately, many back-sliding Christian men and women have spent much time observing potential dates in the pews while supposedly listening to the word of God.  They realize their actions were not good, that they are still spiritually immature, and that their misdeeds have caused a separation between them and their Creator.

It can be quite challenging to focus on the word of God when one is more concerned about getting fleshly needs met.  Using the people of God when one is not a sincere believer is unwise, dangerous and will anger a righteous God.  There is no excuse for such behavior especially when God’s will has not been made clear.  Sometimes a partner or significant other is not found in the church setting, but at other church related events.  Other times a connection is made elsewhere between two like-minded individuals.  

The church is like a hospital, a place where the spiritually ill go to be made well again.  However, it is typically not a place where one should consider dating someone unless there is a specific ministry for singles to connect.  Some churches will set up days and times for singles to study the word together, attend special events, and counseling sessions.

If more people would go to church to focus on the things of the Lord and what his word has to offer, there would be less conflict between the members of the body of Christ.  Singles as well as married couples would be able to attend church without feeling like someone is trying to “hook up” with them.

Nicholl McGuire is an author and inspirational speaker.  She is the author of Face Your Foe on Confronting the Critics and the blog owner.