Before Your Wife Became a Foe - 10 Things You Did or Still Do to Win Her Heart

In the past, you have done fabulous things that have won favor with your wife, but things might have changed with every moment you felt like you were helping rather than hurting her or being hurt when she was only trying to help (Proverbs 12:4).  

It may be time to rekindle the fire in your marriage, so you will need to think of the things that really enhanced your relationship.  You may still be doing some of those things.  Once you have thought of those special moments, add the following to your list and make a point to do each one just “as long as you both shall live!” (Proverbs 18:22)

One.  You take the time to call her when you are away from her.  It doesn’t seem like much, but she appreciates your caring enough about her day to ask her about it. (Proverbs 31:10)

Two.  You visit her unexpectedly.  She may have told you that she will be working late at the job, so you arrive just as she gets off of work with flowers in your hand. (2 Samuel 2:6)

Three.  You surprise her with a vacation and/or gift.  Sometimes daily living becomes rather dull.  A nice surprise like this makes life worth living!  You may have done this back when you dated her, now is the time to try it again. (Hebrews 13:16, Galatians 6:2)

Four.  You talk positively about her to family and friends.  There is nothing that puts a smile on a woman’s face faster, when she knows that her husband speaks lovely about her.  This tells her that you not only say you love her, but everyone else knows it too. (Matthew 19:4-6, Joshua 2:12)

Five.  You kiss and/or hold her without anticipating she have sex with you.  When a man does this it makes her more likely to have sex with you.  She likes to feel the sense of love, security, admiration, and other feelings that come with being held. (Mark 10:6-9)

Six.  You compliment her on how she looks.  Women take the time to pick out clothes, get their hair and nails done, and so much more.  When a man notices her new look it helps her feel more confident that she has made wise choices.  She will often work to make herself look even better for you the next time. (Ephesians 4:32)

Seven.  You look at her while she is talking to you.  By doing this, you have made a point to tell her that you care about what she says.  She will be more apt to share more with you about her feelings just by you making this simple gesture. (Colossians 3:18-19)

Eight.  You tell her how special she is and say, “I love you” without her initiating the conversation.  Making a point to share your feelings without her having to engage you in this sort of conversation will do much for your relationship, because she can be at ease with feelings of insecurity that tend to arise after incidents of mistrust. (I Corinthians 7:1-16)

Nine.  You assist her with household chores without her asking.  Don’t you like it when someone assists you with a task?  Helping her with chores is considerate, your mom would be proud! (Proverbs 11:17)

Ten.  You tell her that she doesn’t have to do anything for you, but love you.  There is so much said in this statement.  The world demands so much from each and every one of us, when someone tells us that we are not obligated to do anything it makes us want to do more.  Remind her that she is special to you and that you didn’t marry her because of what she does for you, but because of who she is!  (1 Corinthians 13:4-7)

By doing any of these tips often, someone reading this will surely have some needed pleasure from the wife! (Proverbs 5:18-19). Take a moment to pray and ask God for wisdom on what you might be overlooking that is contributing to ongoing problems between you and the wife.

Nicholl McGuire is the author of Face Your Foe on Confronting the Critics.